


Tortoises with ear muffs

by Servena



Category: Elementary (TV)
Genre: Ear muffs, Gen, Guns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-17
Updated: 2015-09-17
Packaged: 2018-07-14 00:29:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7144817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Servena/pseuds/Servena
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock wants to teach Joan how to shoot. Joan is not convinced this should happen in their living room.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tortoises with ear muffs

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Черепаха с наушниками](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12393831) by [Tanets_chasov](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tanets_chasov/pseuds/Tanets_chasov)



Joan took one look at the dummy as she entered the living room and said: “No.”

“Yes!”, Sherlock said, raising his right hand and holding a 9mm gun.

“Absolutely not.” She set the bag with the groceries down onto the side table and slipped out of her coat.

“Watson, as you have again experienced yesterday, our work can put you into a significantly amount of danger. Since you rejected my efforts to teach you single stick repeatedly, I have decided to move on to other measures in the hopes that you would be more recipient.”

“You can bury those hopes.” As she returned from the hall, where she had hung up her coat, she sighed and added: “Look, even if I wanted to learn how to use a gun -”

“Aha!”, Sherlock exclaimed. He still held the gun in his hand, which started to make her a bit uncomfortable.

“- I would prefer not to do it in our living room and have the neighbours call the cops on us”, she finished firmly.

Sherlock shrugged. “We are the cops.”

“No, we are not. We are consulting detectives”, she retorted, stressing the last words.

“Cops by association.” He waved his hands in dismissal. She took a step back. “Don’t worry, safety’s in. I’ve lived here for months now. Don’t you think if the neighbours were planning to call the police, they would have had enough occasions by now?”

“The answer is still no.”

“Watson.” The look on his face came close to those of a kicked puppy. Together with the gun in his hand, it made for a rather ridiculous sight.

“No.”

“I even purchased extra sound protection ear muffs!”

“Did you send some to the neighbours?”, she asked dryly.

For a moment he looks like he honestly considers ringing their doorbells. “No, I didn’t think of that, actually. But I built a pair for Clyde”, he added, pointing to the tortoise sitting on the big table.

For the first time, Joan noticed the tortoise and realized it was wearing a pair of small red ear muffs. She smiled. “How cute! I didn’t even know tortoises had ears.”

Sherlock launched himself into an explanation. “This is a common misconception as tortoises don’t have a visible outer ear, but they do in fact have a functioning middle and inner ear, though their hearing capabilities can only be described as subpar compared to humans.”

“Huh”, she said and watched as Clyde munched on a lettuce leaf. The ear muffs didn’t seem to bother him.

“After all the effort I went through, do you want all this -“, he waved at the tortoise and the dummy, “to have been in vain?”

“I will not train to use a gun in our living room.”

 “I could just show you how to hold it”, he suggested.

She sighed and picked up the grocery bag from the side table. “If you really want to show me how to shoot, we could go to a shooting range.”

“Really?” He sounded surprised.

“Really. I’m going to put these”, she motioned at the groceries, “away.” She walked over to the kitchen.

“But what about Clyde? I built ear muffs for him!”, he yelled after her.

“Take him along!”

Sherlock sat down onto the couch. “Do you want to go to a shooting range?”, he asked Clyde.

Clyde took another bite out of his lettuce leaf.


End file.
